As much as I am a champion and advocate for friendship building among females, I am not naive enough to ignore the fact that among women lies this thread of ugliness. I don’t know what’s in some women that feeds this tendency to become angry when a sister does something to better herself. Why do some women feel the need to either hold each other back or pull one down when she makes it up a little higher? I truly don’t understand. I saw this in the Endometriosis community and it saddened me. Now I am seeing it in the Plus Size Community and I am disgusted. Women, what is really the problem? If we get to the cause of the symptoms, we can cure this sickness.
Passion Jonesz is a very popular YouTube Influencer, I have followed her, watched her channel, supported her, and adored her for years. Passion started her channel when she was about 17 years old or so and she was plus size, as in she was between a size 12-16, I don’t know for sure, check her channel if you want to know. Because of her personality, the quality of her content, her relevance, how she inspired plus size girls and women through fashion, and her genuine desire to see women of size feel good about themselves; she has gained not only subscribers but a great deal of notoriety. I am extremely proud of her.
Recently, she revealed that she had weight loss surgery, VSG. I am not here to discuss her reasoning for having the surgery, the purpose of this post is to highlight the ridiculous backlash and abuse that she is receiving from some within the Plus Size Community for making a personal choice, it is absolutely absurd. Since announcing her surgery, people have taken to social media and called her everything from a fraud to a scam and other things that I dare not repeat. I am enraged and confused! This woman came onto a platform that she helped create and shared her struggles with weight, from how it impaired her ability to be as active as she wanted to be with her children to how it was affecting her physically and mentally, and all hell broke loose, why?
I sincerely don’t understand the problem. Is it the weight loss that is angering some? Is it jealousy? Do they desire to have surgery and can’t? What is at the heart of the matter? What further plagues me is how a community of women who face such discrimination and judgment can become the exact thing that they profess to hate. If one knows the pain of being judged on appearance alone, how can that same one do it to another? Personally, I thought Passion was beyond beautiful even at her highest weight, she was a snack honey. However, as a plus size woman who has for the second time in her life reached her highest weight of 294 lbs, I understand the need and the seriousness of getting some of this weight off. No matter how good we look and how well we carry it, weight is heavy. Our breasts can get heavy, our butts can get heavy, and it can be taxing to carry it for some. Beyond all of this, Passion owes us NO explanation for making a life decision, yet she came to us open and transparent and instead of getting support and love, she got attacked.
Women, until we can cure the sickness that cause this kind of behavior, we will continue to have challenges in creating and sustaining friendships. Why do some desire to hold people captive in a box? Passion’s weight loss isn’t the problem, the issue is people’s discomfort with themselves. Passion was loving and courageous enough to share her story and it pissed people off, not because of the weight loss but because she spoke their shared truth only she was daring enough to say, “it got out of hand and I had to get help.” The greatest threat to the sacredness of friendships among women is the disease of comparison and envy. Until we can look to one another and learn from each other and grow together, many women will continue to either have no friends or have disastrous interactions with each other.
I salute you Passion for not only having the courage to change your situation but for having a heart for a community that you knew would turn on you, yet you boldly and bravely shared your story. I am sure that your story has changed, will change, and is changing lives; especially of those whom had the most hurtful things to say about you. In spite of the backlash and hate that she has received, Passion has created her own line of Highlighters and Make up Setting Spray, she is doing EPIC stuff. You can purchase her make up products at https://www.passionjoneszfashion.com/
Onward to you with love. I wish you wellness and happiness, Mrs. Passion Jonesz!