Last night, as I was scrolling through Instagram, I stumbled upon a blogger talking about Blogtober, I ‘d never heard of such, I was intrigued. After some research, I decided to take the plunge and join in. Because my career as a Blogger is so tightly linked to my purpose, I must stay current, relevant, but true to my niche. Since re-branding my social media presence, I have found that growth is very slow but steady. One of the challenges that I am facing is getting people to connect with me in the area of spirituality, healing, and wellness. My content on social networks has always been related to makeup, Endometriosis, and beauty topics. I think Blogtober is the ideal time for me to dig in deeper, solidify my presence in a community of people that are changing lives, and to formally introduce myself.
Almost three years ago, my life imploded and I found myself in a very dark place, I won’t get into the particulars here, you can find out about my life in my previous blog posts. After being supported through my circumstances and going to therapy, I have emerged almost completely from that space, it feels amazing. One of the results of my healing journey is the shift in my focus, things that were once paramount to my happiness are no longer important enough for me to dedicate my life’s work to them. While I still enjoy getting cute, slaying a good wig, and discussing Endometriosis awareness will always be a cause that I work for, my earnest desire to see other people, especially women living a life that isn’t consumed by fear, grief, and pain is my true calling. Because I have been through it, I want to teach others how to get through it.
The question then becomes, who am I? Of all the things that I could tell you about growing up in Detroit, being the youngest sibling by almost two decades, having my daddy wrapped around my finger, my grandma as my angel in human form, my mom who loved me obsessively, surviving violence and childhood trauma, and living with Endometriosis; as much as all of that contributes profoundly to who I am, I am more invested in who I am becoming and how she can serve the masses. I am a woman who has faced her stuff and is doing the work to heal. Listen, healing isn’t an undertaking for the weak, it requires a determination that borders on the insane. When you start to take the bandages off of your wounds and they begin to bleed all over your life, you have to make a choice, do you clean it up or keep bleeding. Most people choose the latter because it is easier. It requires zero effort to be who you have always been and do what you have always done, the problem with that is nothing changes. When life knocked me on my butt and I was left alone with me, I took a look at myself, I saw my trauma, the crippling grief, the consuming fears, and my obsessive need to please people. I was existing and waiting to die because living doesn’t happen in such a place, not authentic soul empowering living, at least.
With this new awakening and the guidance of my support person, we systematically began to take my life apart and rearrange the pieces so that I could start creating and living a life that I love. What I discovered underneath all of the debris was ME. As women, we are taught what to believe, who to marry, what jobs we should have, what to do with our bodies, etc; our lives are curated for us from conception. I am no exception, my grandma was strict about religion, relationships, and how I should live. It was a suffocating way to live and I knew different was possible but I didn’t dare to pursue it, defy my grandma, NEVER! The funny thing about living to please other others, when the folks that you live for die, you are left alone with a stranger, YOU. In a tumultuous sweep, death came in and snatched my family away rapidly, I was lost.
Alone. Just me, myself, and I. Ironically, from the darkest times of my life, came the brightest light. The lessons that life taught me, equipped me with the ability to help others. Things about myself that I shunned and denied began to make sense. I understood why I was always different, everything about me was a divine design and for the first time in my life, I owned and embraced it, healing was happening. At the core of who I am, I am a teacher. Professionally, before Endometriosis ravaged my body, I was a teacher. Watching another person learn and grow has always been a phenomenon that invigorates my existence. Therefore, it’s only natural that I take up the mantle of healing and teach women how to go on their own exploration of untainted self-discovery that leads to an empowering and life-changing reality.
WELCOME TO BLOGTOBER!